Patricia Chambers, known more by her pen name of Storm DeVille, my girlfriend of 23 years, passed away today after a two year battle with cancer.
Obviously, there’s a ton more I could say, and should say. I’m a bit at a loss for words right now, however.
She left this world the way she lived in it. On her terms, with no drama. She drifted away, and was gone, peacefully, quietly. The way she wanted. There was no more pain, no more suffering. Just a dignified passing, for someone who never took what was handed to her, and always fought to live on her terms.
Some of you have been around this silly blog long enough to know about all of this. A lot of you haven’t. So, this may come as a surprise to some that while I’ve been making snarky remarks in anime reviews, I was watching the love of my life slowly succumb to cancer.
Patricia wasn’t one for drama, or being in the spotlight. She would have hated the idea of this blog becoming a running commentary on her long walk to meet with death. She loved what it was. An odd mix of fiction, comic books, anime, and general sarcasm. Very early on, she made a point of telling me she didn’t want to see that change, and yes, I read her every post I made.
Her vision got really bad the last eight months, to the point she could not read them herself, so I continued on, reading her every word I wrote for this. To be honest, that’s a lot of what has kept this, and me, going these past couple years.
It made her smile.
There was nothing better in this world to me than that.
I’ve got a post scheduled to go up tomorrow, and one for Monday half written. I plan to finish it, and collect my thoughts to make a proper goodbye to her. While this whole blogging thing has long been little more than me nattering on about the things I love, usually with sarcasm, it would never feel right to me if Ididn’t take the time to properly talk about the one thing in this world I loved most of all, now that she can’t can’t tell me not to.
She hated being in the spotlight, but she loved it when I gave her a hard time. We had that kind of a relationship.
She was really special. I wish you guys could have known her.
I’m gonna go spend some time grieving, but I’ll be okay.
She was at peace at the end. That’s all I could ever hope for, or want. So, it hurts, but I’ll be okay.
She made me strong enough to be okay.